I recently had a friend of a friend
hound me to set her up with one of my guy friends. One of my favorite guy
friends. Finally she said to me “give me your number, I’ll text you pictures of
me” an aggressive move on her part. At that point, my hesitation and
deliberation about introducing people from different parts of my life, is taken
out of the equation. I can’t receive the pictures then not pass them on. Then I’m
a sexy picture hoarder. I passed them along and thought “now I’m involved,
whether they like it or not”
Now they both have what I like to
call, a love meddler.
Setting people up is always a crap
shoot. They are both your friends and who doesn’t want to see friends find love.
We as humans tend to think “this is perfect! Two likable people who are
interested in each other. This is a no brainer” the caper is everybody has
relationship issues. EVERYBODY. Will their idiosyncrasies mesh? It’s like an
issues jigsaw puzzle and nobody knows if all the pieces really fit but you
started the damn puzzle and you got some of it and you think you can see what
it will look like when it’s done but it’s kinda too time consuming and
sometimes you pretend like your still into it but in your head you know you’ve
tried to fit that three bubbled bit with two straight edges into a corner slot
7 times already and it doesn’t fit but to stay in the game you pretend that’s
the piece you’re working on. The point is you may be sending them on a
candlelit cruise of exploration or you may be shoving them into a hot lava pit
of romantic incompatibility.
That being said, I am a girl,
physiologically and somewhat emotionally, so I have to meddle. Just a bit. As a
girl asking questions like “Would you ever be into Joey?” is commonplace. Now
if a dude goes and asks those types of questions I’m sure the conversation is a
bit more lewd and definitely short lived. Guys are not great information
gatherers when it comes to one on one interaction. Have you noticed? There is nothing worse than finally getting
some one on one time with a guy you like and you’re navigating the conversation
with questions. I have blown a gasket more than once with a revealing question
like “Don’t you have any questions for me?” and then they look at me like “You are seriously keeping track of who asks
who how many questions?” and I look back like “Fuckin A I am.” And the rest of
the night is spent with few words but a lot of faces being made.
So yes, as a girl I will be
following up with my set up. They haven’t even met yet so I figure I’ll have my
mitts in this thing for another 6 to 8 weeks.
Thats about two months of meddling.
Just when I thought I had nothing going on this summer………………
Thanks for listening.
Kendra is a stand up comic
living in Brooklyn where she owns a super comfortable bed. She spends most of
her time wondering where the hell her sugar daddy is and hoping he didn’t